1. SLOW DOWN NELLY: No offense, yet I highly doubt you’ll find the One in your 20′s. You may, yet the majority of you will settle in your 20′s… yet if you wait until your 30′s, will find a real keeper. (Note* out of fear I married in my 20′s. Tall dark and handsome millionaire. How does it get even better, right? Yet I didn’t ask if I really loved him. He loved me and I was insecure and that was enough. Divorce #1)
2. YOU’RE ACTUALLY ENOUGH: Society wants you to think you’re not enough unless you marry, that you’re defective broken and a loser if you’re in your 30′s and not married. They do this to control you, keep you in fear and sell you crap. You don’t require a man to be enough. You are enough and I implore you to choose a man that contributes extra juju to your life, not completes you. (plus women that know they are enough attract far higher quality of men, for their not needy, they are open to a great life getting even better)
3. IF YOU’RE TIRED, TAKE A NAP! Duty dating? Please!!!!! Stop! The only reason you’d be tired of dating is if you put tremendous pressure on yourself to find a man before you turn into a pumpkin! Dating from that place make you needy and undesirable and very prone to being manipulated. If you’re tired from the dating scene, date yourself for a while, date life, date a hobby, date your friends… or just don’t date. Fall back in love with you and remember what a gem you are.
4. PRETEND HE’S #47: When I was first divorced and on the ‘scene’ again… I just wanted to get this whole dating thing over with and find the One. EVERY man I’d think, Is he the one? I was obsessed and it was exhausting. So played this game with myself that he’s #47 and I could only meet him if I received a gift from 46 men who would teach me what I liked and what I didn’t, would teach me boundaries, speaking my truth, saying no thank you, really learning about me so when I met the ONE… it would be easy, instantaneous and obvious. This made dating fun, not so significant and delicious to go out and explore what I was going to learn from each man.
5. BE WILLING TO SAY GOODBYE: If he’s not a Hell Yes, he’s a Hell No. Relationships that work aren’t perfect, yet there is something very special about them. He contributes to you by being exactly who he is. It’s natural. You contribute to him being exactly who you are, it’s organic. Sex works. Money’s handled. He allows you to be you. You allow him to be him. Two healthy adults. In ease being together. It’s possible. And the BEST BEST way to achieve this is to be at ease with yourself. If you have an internal battle of self abuse, not enough’ness, body issues or fears going on… use your downtime to handle this, give me a call and let’s dissolve all the lies about who you are… and bring you home to the magnificent phenomenal goddess you truly are.
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