bosanchez - What Is The Enemy of Happiness?

 

 

         The enemy of happiness isn’t sadness.

         The enemy of happiness isn’t problems.

         The enemy of happiness isn’t loneliness.

         The enemy of happiness is fear.

         We run our lives by fear.

         In Dan Baker’s excellent book, What Happy People Know, he explains how our body circuitry is wired to fear. 

         Our brains have three parts.  The brain stem, the amygdala, and the neocortex.  The more primitive parts of our brains, the brain steam (also called the reptilian brain, because reptiles have these for brains) and the amygdala are programmed for fear.

         Why?  Our ancestors needed fear for their physical survival.  Imagine yourself living in the wilderness with lions, wolves, and cobras around you.  Danger lurks behind every tree and shadow. 

Once their brains register fear, the endocrine glands produce our fear hormones adrenaline and cortisol.  It gave them super strength to fight or flight.  And in fighting or fleeing, they exhaust the adrenaline and cortisol in their bodies.  Well and good.  But what about us who usually sit behind desks and work on computers?

         We still have the same fear mechanism.

         But this time, we’re no longer afraid of lions or cobras behind every tree.

         We’re afraid of our rising credit card bills.

         We’re afraid of our boss.

         We’re afraid of losing our jobs.

         We’re afraid for our children—what will happen to their future?

         We’re afraid that at 41, we won’t get married anymore.

         We’re afraid we’ll grow old and lonely.

         We’re afraid we’ll run out of money.

         We’re afraid of social rejection.

         We’re afraid of disease.

         And these fears are so real, our endocrine glands produce adrenaline and cortisol as well.  And because we’re seated behind our desks all day, we really don’t use up any of it.  Adrenaline and cortisol become poison in our bodies, destroying our health bit by bit.

         Thus, very few people are happy.

         Conclusion: If you want to be happy, we need to overcome our fears.

         How?

The Only Antidote to Fear Is…

 

         Twenty years ago, a friend gave me a book about facing fears.

         My arrogant response to her: “Thanks for the book.  But frankly, I don’t think I need it.  I don’t know why, but fear isn’t a problem for me.  I don’t have any fears.”

         Ten years later, I ate my words.

         Because after a deep soul search, I realized how my life was run by many fears.  Many of the things I was doing I did because of fear!

         I feared what other people said about me.

         I feared failure.

         I feared angry people.

         I feared of not having enough.

         I feared of not being enough.

         In my life, I’ve discovered that there is only one thing that can overcome fear.

         There is only one thing that is more powerful than fear.

         The only antidote to fear is love.

         When you fill your life with love, your fears naturally disappear.

         I’m talking about a love for God, a love for others, a love for yourself, and a love for life itself.  The Bible says, Perfect love casts out all fear.  (1 John 4:18)

         Once your fears are gone, happiness will flood your soul.

 

         May your dreams come true,

 

         Bo Sanchez

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