Q: For about a year, I have been dating (what I thought) was a wonderful man. I am very protective of my disabled brother so I am hesitant to introduce men in my life to him. This guy was different so I wanted him to understand that if he was going to be a part of my life, he was going to be a part of my brother’s as well. The way he acted towards him was atrocious! He ignored him and if my brother made contact, he jumped as if my brother’s disability would rub off on him! I thought he was the one but now I am not sure. Thoughts?
A: I’m so sorry love. This experience must trouble your heart in two ways – how he treated your brother and disappointment for believing he was the one. While I do not condone his behavior, I must say that people have a tendency to act unpredictable and/or unkind when they are around people who are different from them. Through education and practice, people can change. Would you be open to communicating with your boyfriend, without judgment? Sitting in his shoes and inviting him to learn, expand his mind, and open his vision to a different perspective?
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