Skip to main content

Allana Pratt, Intimacy Expert - My Husband Wants A Divorce – I don’t!

Question: My husband wants a divorce and I don’t. My parents were divorced and I swore if I ever got married, I would make it last. This would destroy me. We don’t have any kids so he has no reason to stay. How do I make him understand that we need to stay together? How do I get him to remember why he fell in love with me in the first place?

10240221894_09829dffbd

Answer: My love, I hear that your husband wants to end your marriage and you don’t. That must hurt. And yet I hear the reason doesn’t have to do with your marriage so much as because of your parents marriage, thus your reaction is based on the past, not the present moment. Can you see that?

Quite often we make vows or agreements or we sentence ourselves to certain things as a reaction to the past, not as a powerful choice in the present moment.

Remember love, nobody has the power to destroy you, you are unbreakable. No circumstances are ever bigger than you even though in the moment it often feels like that.

Forgive me, yet you can’t make a man understand that you need to stay together… because everybody always has a choice, nobody ‘needs’ to stay together. Telling somebody they need to stay together is controlling their free will and this behavior create separation and actually push them away more.

I like your angle about getting reconnected with why you both fell in love in the first place. What do you believe has led to his desire for a divorce? Has the kindness gone? Has the appreciation or freedom gone? Have your physical sexual priorities shifted? Are you growing in different spiritual directions? Are either of you taking each other for granted? Are you struggling with conflict resolution and building resentment and frustrations? Are you able to talk about difficulties in an honoring authentic honest manner?

It’s intense but even very possible that the universe is asking you to heal from your parents divorce by having to go through your own divorce so that you could have compassion for your parents, husband and for yourself. Every challenge is the seed for great growth, evolution and development.

And the more we give people choice, the greater sense of freedom we provide them with, which supports people in choosing to stay connected in the long term, if that’s their sacred contract.

What if you forgive your parents, forgive your husband, and be tender and compassionate with yourself as you embrace ‘allowance’ of what is? Just dissolving the resistance to your husband’s choice is enough to open the door to an authentic conversation that could lead to healing.

If I can be of contribution to you both in that domain, it would be my privilege. Contact manager@AllanaPratt.com to set up a strategy session to see if you two are a fit for me to support you in either healing your marriage or consciously uncoupling. Let’s dive in and embrace the lesson letting go of attachment to the outcome, as challenging as that can be, beautiful.

Bless and love,

Allana

The post My Husband Wants A Divorce – I don’t! appeared first on Allana Pratt.



via Allana Pratt http://ift.tt/1ptvVuf

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

How to Set Priorities Using the ABCDE Method - Brian Tracy

The more thought you invest into setting priorities before you begin a task, the faster you will get the important things done. The more important and valuable the task is to you, the more motivated you are to overcome procrastination and launch yourself into the job. William Matthews said,  “The first law of success is concentration – to bend all the energies to one point, and to go directly to that point, looking neither to the right or to the left.” Today, I want to share a method of time-management for setting priorities that I’ve been using for years, called the ABCDE method. FREE TIME MANAGEMENT TOOL: Download the ABCDE Checklist PDF The ABCDE Method The ABCDE Method is a powerful priority setting technique that you can use every single day. This technique is so simple and effective that it can make you one of the most efficient and effective people in your field. The ABCDE list is a to-do list on steroids when it comes to learning how to prioritize . The power of t...

Allana Pratt, Intimacy Expert - My boyfriend’s messaging strange women

Question: Do you have any idea why a man would start instant messaging strange woman after being in a five year relationship. Said he was “stupid” and wasn’t physical with anybody. I guess you can say I have trust issues. Answers: Ouch! I am so sorry. Do I have any idea why? Here is what I have learned, first off I am really sorry because that really hurts. If you have trust issues especially, that would hurt and sting even more. So first something about trust and then something about men. Trust: When we trust, it’s not that we trust someone to be perfect. That sets us up for failure because no one is perfect and you can’t control anybody. That is insanity if we try to control another and put all of our power – making sure they be a certain way to so that we are safe. Instead, find that safety and trust inside you. That safety being that capacity to discern and know that come what may, you’ve got your own back – you can take care of yourself. It takes a lot of pressure off of other...

lynda - Jane Wurwand, Founder of Dermalogica, this week on Glambition Radio

Jane Wurwand is not only the founder of the #1 brand of skin care in the world, but she’s also changing women’s lives on a global level . I’m thrilled to have her as my guest on today’s episode of Glambition Radio . Jane (originally from the UK) and her husband launched their business back in 1983 in Marina del Rey, CA with $14,000, no bank loans and no investors. Today, Dermalogica boasts sales of more than $250,000 million a year and is sold in 86 countries around the world! It’s a true rags-to-riches story, and she tells all in our interview . What many people may not know about Jane is that she is also fighting to empower women all over the world. She founded FITE , Financial Independence Through Entrepreneurship, which invests in local grassroots initiatives to help women and girls become leaders . To date, her FITE program has helped fund more than 40,000 loans for women to start or grow businesses in over 65 countries! (Visit JoinFITE.org to see how you can get involved.) O...